Smile

Have you ever truly smiled because you really felt like you were doing what you were supposed to be doing? I can't help but think that now-a-days. Especially Thursday and Friday. Those were the first two weekdays that I didn't work late, came home in the afternoon, and spent time with the babies all evening. When I'm doing that, I just get this powerful feeling that says, "THIS is what you were meant to do." And the fact that I'm not married and starting my own family doesn't bother me, simply because God found a way to bless me with children even at this time in my life. It's incredible.

People keep telling me, "You love them so much ... just imagine how much you'll love your own kids!" They just don't get it. I was so blessed this morning talking to my mom who said that she totally understood that I love them as much as I'd ever love my own kids, especially after she spent 2 weeks with them in Maine this summer. :) At least SOMEONE else understands!

Well, Christian just woke up after only a 1/2 hour nap, when I'd expected him to sleep for 2 hours. He's trying to fall back to sleep. I need to go nap because my time is running out and we're going to Katie's grandparent's house for dinner tonight.

Slow Updates

Since being blessed with two wonderful children in my life, my blogging updates have become few and far between!

Perhaps most importantly, to correct my previous entry, the court hearing on September 7th is a mandated hearing to report their progress. They happen often for these boys because of their young age. So, I'll be writing a letter discussing the progress that they've made in the past six weeks and the judge will also inquire about the progress of their mother. There will be no chance of them leaving on September 7th. Not that it's not important to pray about, but it's less dramatic than I originally thought.

We had a meeting with caseworkers on Friday morning. I wish I could replay the entire meeting, but due to confidentiality laws, I can't. It was rather funny. Two parts stick out to me, though.
1. Katie keeps getting mad when we get paperwork for the boys because it is always addressed to "Kristen" rather than "Christian". Well, turns out they really think his name is "Kristen". They told me to call him "Kris" until we find out how to pronounce his name. (We're still hoping "Kristen" is pronounced "Krishten" ... I don't really care about the spelling.) Funny thing is, I'd just made a BIG deal about people not calling him Chris, mostly because I LOVE the name Christian. I stopped arguing with them and just decided I'll continue calling him by Christian, unless I find out otherwise. I should find out September 2nd.
2. September 2nd there is a visit with the boys' brothers - Monteko, 5 yrs, who I had for 3 nights at the beginning of this mess and Coby, 3 yrs, who I've never met. It'll be on mutual territory with Katie, myself, 2 caseworkers, and various other adults. Their mom has refused these types of visits. However, my caseworker said there was a possibility she could change her mind should she find out about this visit. So ... there's potential for a real Lifetime movie in this thing ... anyone wanna produce it for me?

I'm at home (in MA) for my grandparents' 60th wedding anniversary. Considering I'm so far away from getting married, it's hard for me to understand celebrating 60 years of marriage! God bless them. :) Keon and Christian are NOT with me ... can you believe that? The are respiting with a family in Sharpsville (only 4 miles from my house, thank goodness.) Originally, I was told they HAD to respite once a month, so I gave in trying to have them come with me for this trip. Now I have a new caseworker and I don't think she'll make me respite them, but I guess it's still good for them to know a family. The mom runs a daycare and has a nice, big yard for them to play in. Wanna know something psycho? Kels and I mapquested their address and drove by about 45 minutes after they left. Then I had to bring Christian's eardrops to the house. THEN, when Katie got off of work, we drove by again. PSYCHO! They seem nice enough, but I don't plan on making leaving them any sort of habit!

Well, I'm off to get ready for the party. Thanks for reading these exciting updates! ;)

Vacation

I'm going to attempt to post a little bit right now, but to be quite honest, I don't think I'll get very far. That's because Keon is sitting at a broken computer near me typing and keeping himself busy. It won't be long before he realizes that his computer doesn't have anything on the screen and mine does and that means he'll want the one I'm using! Christian is crawling around on the floor putting random things in his mouth. I don't mind as long as they aren't small enough for him to choke on. Other new moms would find me apalling (spelling?) I let my (foster) children do way more than they should be allowed to do at their young ages (of 10 months and 20 months!)

So, we just spent 2 weeks at a cottage in Maine. I'm 24 years old. This is my 25th summer vacationing at the same cottage in Maine. It's great. The first week, my mom's family comes. My mom's parents were there, along with one of her sister's, my uncle, five cousins, and ten second cousins. The second week were spent with the Keller family and also a short visit from Tom and Sandy Lombardo, friends from my church in MA. Good times, let me tell you! Swimming, kayaking, canoeing, speed boating with the Lombardos (tubing and skiing!), walking, shopping, cooking ... fun times had by all, I'm sure!

Perhaps the most exciting part of the trip were that my two foster sons were granted permission to come on vacation with me. Kelsey and I trekked to Massachusetts on a Friday with Keon and Christian, spent the night at home, and then travelled to Maine together on Saturday morning. Kels had spent two weeks with me taking care of the kids in PA. Then she spent two weeks in Maine with us. You'd think she'd be sick of us, but she's also driving back to PA with us tomorrow to spend her fifth week with me, 24 hours a day, God bless her!

Yesterday was the one-month anniversary of getting Keon and Christain. A little emotional. Originally, I was told I wouldn't have to think of anything until December, but there is now a court date on Sept. 7th. For my blog readers, please start praying that God's will would be obvious to all (and that I'd accept the decision.) Not only do I have myself to worry about, I also have my entire family in love with these babies! ;)

My life is a little bit tumultuous right now. Random question. Are turmoil and tumultuous related words? I found out that I'm moving schools (within the district) and changing grades, supposedly just for one year. I'll be teaching fifth grade, which is THE grade in PA right now, for the state testing. I guess it doesn't matter that I spent all last year writing curriculum for fourth grade. Nevermind the fact that I was the only fourth grade teacher this year, that there are now two fourth grades in my school, so you'd THINK it'd make sense for me to stay in that position. A newer teacher will move from 5th to 4th and a retiring teacher will return from 6th back to his 4th grade position. Then they say I'll be back in 4th next year. Another move. And there's nothing I can do to make people NOT hate me. No matter what, if I move again next year, people at my new school will be mad. If I stay, I'll make enemies at my old school. Guess I have to grin and bear it ... I'd also prefer not to make this move considering I'm trying to take care of Keon and Christian, while returning to work and starting my master's. Am I crazy?

OK, everyone's up and I need to rescue them from baby-sitting my children. Hard to keep them occupied in a house that's less baby-proof than mine! Please post a comment to make me feel loved. :)