Blatantly Honest

OK, many of you have - at one time or another - encouraged me in my foster parenting by telling me one of many things: 1)you are being so selfless in using your time to help these children, 2)you are sharing Christ's love with these children, 3)you are impacting so many children's lives, etc. Tonight I want you to know that, first of all, I feel totally inadequate to be doing what I'm doing and I consider it an infinitely huge blessing that the Lord has allowed me to be a foster mother at this time in my life! I am definitely blessed every single day by these children. However, it seems to me that many of you get the idea that this just comes naturally. Tonight I have a 13 year-old boy in the blue bedroom. It's midnight so I have to go to bed, but he's still up playing the electric guitar. He's been diagnosed with some serious attachment disorders and, therefore, needs highly qualified respite care. Do you know what my training was? Three packets about three pages long each on different attachment issues that I was told I should read sometime this weekend (which I tried to read while watching a movie after 10 PM tonight!) It is so NOT natural and quite uncomfortable to have a guest in your home who you know nothing about, who doesn't really understand why he has to be there, and who you don't really know how to entertain or set up rules for. It's so WEIRD! I know I won't sleep tonight. That's just life. But, nonetheless, it's an incredible opportunity and a really interesting experience. I just thought I should be candid for an evening and I had to get that off my chest. :) (BTW, I am always hearing of people reading my blog, but do you know that I have the least amount of comments out of all my friends that have blogs? Come on guys!)